I was diagnosed recently with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). A psychiatrist assessing my suitability for a new depression treatment suggested that I be evaluated. He was right.
The average woman is diagnosed with ADHD in her late 30s or early 40s. I am 65 years old.
That crashing sound you hear is me shattering yet another bell curve.
This diagnosis explained SO much.
Untreated ADHD often leads to depression in adulthood. I’ve dealt with major depressive disorder since I was 15 (I wasn’t diagnosed until age 30). ADHD often manifests as an all-consuming interest in something new - only to have that interest suddenly and completely vanish. Just check out all of the idle equipment and supplies in my garage. (Anyone need beads? Beading thread? Jewelry findings?)
ADHD is often characterized by high levels of distractability - I’ll go upstairs to take a shower, only to be distracted by some clothes that need to be donated - which leads to my organizing my closet - and two hours later, I still haven’t showered.
Girls are diagnosed with ADHD at much lower levels than boys are. Signs of ADHD in girls are more subtle; girls are less likely to demonstrate the more obvious hyperactivity and impulsivity traditionally associated with ADHD. Daydreaming, for example, can be a sign of the inattentive type ADHD, but is often disregarded. It was in my case - teachers just thought I was bored because I was smart.
Women are being diagnosed with ADHD at increasing rates - partly because of a greater understanding of ADHD symptoms and the interrelationship between ADHD and depression. In many cases, treating ADHD relieves depression symptoms.
One of the ADHD symptoms that is often unrecognized is perfectionism. Those with ADHD want everything to be just right. And that focus on perfection often leads to procrastination; if I can’t figure out how to make something perfect, I can often be too paralyzed to even begin a project.
I am a Hall of Fame level practitioner of what I call “productive procrastination.” Say I need to pull together all of the documents necessary for the accountants to prepare our tax returns. I’ll start - but I’ll get distracted. Instead of pulling documents together, I’ll do laundry or sweep up leaves or delete old emails. I will be busy and productive - but focused on the wrong things.
Procrastination is often considered a character flaw. Until I received my ADHD diagnosis, I beat myself up constantly about my procrastination. Not that I have all of a sudden accepted procrastination as OK - it IS a problem - but I now understand that part of my brain is working against me.
This understanding has allowed me to be kinder to myself. I am not a bad or weak or useless person.
What I need is not judgment - especially from myself. I need firm deadlines - preferable including interim deadlines. And I need someone or something to help me be accountable.
How about you? How do you manage procrastination?